Thursday, May 19, 2011

Dear Diary "My girl likes to Zumba all the time Zumba all the time..."

You know its good when you wear leather
Zumba all the tiiiime (to the tune of Party all the Time arranged by the genius Rick James sung by Eddie Murphy).  So a long long long long time ago Living Social had a coupon for 20 Zumba classes for $20 bucks I think I don't remember.  Anyways it was CHEAP.  So I thought what the heck I will buy this.  Well I avoided it like the plague, thinking no way this lady here, yeah me, my a** was too fat.  My friend Ouisa aka Celestitude had taken it and said it is a work out and you can't breaf very well.  We both have asthma (side note took a breathing test my lungs breath like 45 year old lungs AWESOME!)  Anyways then I did 2 Insanity workouts count them 2!  Have you done this, well if you are like me and Obese and Sedentary DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!  If you are like Jonathan who is overweight but can work out like a mad man by all means do it.  Seriously Shaun T can kiss my Big Mexican A**.  I knew I was in for something when the stick thin athletic girl was barely stumbling through the end of the workout DVD and she was as thin as a straw with maybe some boobs.  Seriously she fell flat on the ground and was like NO MORE SHAUN T and I am like WHAT IS THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Anyways so that made me think I am avoiding Zumba because its fast pace dancing and Insanity is fast pace cardio workouts and I was dying.  I was sure Jonathan would need a defibrillator to zap me back from the dead. ***Cue dramatic ER sequence and my John Dorian daydreaming  "CLEAR" Kachunk "CLEAR" Kachunk " We are not losing you on my watch Damn You, quick wave the cheese cake in her face"
Well on my mom's birthday besides the Facebooking my cousin Joey Jay was talking how she lost 10 lbs because her work is doing Biggest Loser Contest.  She realized she had to do it because our family is diabeetus central.  My mom was diagnosed at 38, that is less then 7 years away for yours truly.  So I realized okay yeah I am already pre-diabeetus and this is no bueno.  Joey Jay told me her secret was eating right, walking and ZUMBA!!!!!!  I thought whoa hold up really.  She said yup.  She loves it!  Well after my cleanse of Facebook and TV I realized maybe I should be doing something with my free time.  So 2 weeks ago I finally did it.

Animal doing Zumba not fun :(

Now first off you should NOT NOT NOT NOT go to morning Zumba class hungover with a bad headache.  Yeah who has two thumbs and danced through Zumba hungover...*ME*  Not a good idea at all.  I did it though and it was a work out!  I got a little lost but luckily the instructor Silk (not his name but his moves were smooth as Silk) was good in yelling the moves and boy this guy was fast and he could move his body. Damn you Silk you move better then I ever can.   Anyways I always find it hilarious because in Zumba you move your hips a LOT!  And for those who know me I was blessed with hips and wide butt thanks Mom.  So in my class its a mix of ladies of all sizes so yay, love that, but there are tiny little girls who have no hips and no butt and some how they are moving their "hips".  It looks Hilarious because they all move the same, like Animal in the Muppets, and they never NEVER NEVER follow the instructor Silk, he goes one way they go the opposite way and some how those women end up near me and I am afraid if they bump into me my fat butt will send them flying across the room.  Yeah but I really love it so far despite tiny ladies flailing their limbs and calling it dancing.  I pretend I am in a dance group trying to get my groove on and we only have one chance to win the show, LOL, no seriously I think of it as dancing and it makes it better.  I used to love to dance going to the clubs when I was younger.  Best clubs to go to gay clubs, okay Gay male clubs best music and dancing EVER.  Anyways I don't do that anymore I am old, my ladies who I dance with have kids or live in Antartica, and my husband doesn't dance anymore, he has retired from dropping it like its hot.  So doing Zumba is like a release of my awesomeness and I am exercising.  Dude I find this hilarious especially since my friends and I in college would make fun of the infomercials they had to buy the Zumba DVDs and look at me now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  So in conclusion some exercising can be fun, its not just a chore.  I need to be tricked into exercising like a little kid who is tricked into eating vegetables.  So kudos to Zumba for hiding the broccoli well!
For those who were curious on how my husband dropped it like its hot, see below...


Dahnya said...


PS: Illegally blog reading at work leads to me not being able to see the Hammer's droppin' it pic/video?? Please say it's a video.

Delena said...

Hahaha its a video but not of Jonathan its the sun drop commercial with the girl who drops it like its hot and it reminded me of Jonathan. There is no video out there of him that I know of but whoever is his friend that has it please email it to me!!!!!!!!! Looking at you Jake and Luis and Jay.

Joey said...

Yay for doing ZUMBA!!! It is awesome and my workout pants are a little looser! It is so exciting to see the pounds dropping (even if it is a pound a week). I have a scale that tells you if you have lost or gain and by how much. I love to see the little arrow pointing "down".

PS. It has been fun texting insteading of FB'ing..... :) I'm a FB whore so it will take some serious effort to quit cold turkey.

Celeste said...

In my own defense, I tried Zumba when I didnt know I had adult onset asthma hence my near fainting daily. Im lucky I didnt die.

Delena said...

Yeah I have been doing Zumba not taking my asthma meds and wow baaaaaaaaaaad idea. I realized this when I almost passed out doing the breathing test at my doctor's office. Yeah go me having lungs like an emphysema patient.